"Put yourself at the top of your to-do list every day and watch as everything else falls into place."
It is honouring yourself and the life you have been given by continuing to develop who you are so you can become the best version of yourself.
How do you develop self-love?
The fasted way to develop self-love is to have a self-care practice. This is a daily discipline that if not implemented, can lead us down an unhealthy, unfulfilling and exhausting path.
I have lots of clients who come to me burnt out, overwhelmed and feel like they are not living up to their full potential.
They say things like "I know I shouldn't complain, I have a wonderful family, great friends, but I just feel empty at times."
If you can relate to this, then you are not alone.
It is in our instincts to want to nurture and help others, which is a beautiful thing; however, not when it is at the cost of our own health and happiness.
When we put the needs of others before our own for too long, we start to feel our life is not our own, which can lead to us feeling resentful, frustrated and even angry at times.
We begin to make excuses for why we cant prioritize ourselves, often blaming time, work and other commitments.
What we need to remember is self-care is not a selfish act or one for the self-absorbed.
It's about getting in touch with who we are, focusing on our wellbeing and showing up each day full of energy.
We can't help others unless we help ourselves first. If we genuinely want to be there for the people, we love, then self-care is a must. When we prioritize our own health we can give more and be around the people we love for longer, which in the end is better for everyone.
So how do you build a self-care practice?
Here are five ways you can begin.
What we give out is what we get back. When we have an attitude of gratitude daily, we begin to notice all the goodness already in our lives.
Too many people I coach are so future-focused and say things like "when I get that promotion, I will be happy" or "when I meet the right partner, I will be complete."
NEWS FLASH… by always focusing on the future you are missing out on today, this moment.
Happiness is a choice. You never know what is around the corner, so why wait to be happy.
The quickest way to feel joy is to focus on gratitude.
So this week wake up and think of 3 things you could be grateful for each day.
Even in the darkest of hours, there is always something to be thankful for, even if somedays you have to look a little harder.
"Comparison is the thief of joy"
We live in a society where comparing ourselves to others is so easy. All we have to do is jump on our social accounts and see our friends buying a new car, or on another holiday or renewing their wedding vows, and we can instantly feel like we are a failure or that our lives are dull and boring.
Remember; you never know what is going on behind closed doors, and social media is often peoples showreels with perfect filtered pictures (probably taken hundreds of times).
It would be easy to compare yourself and quickly feel down about your life circumstances.
This is why the only person we should ever compete or compare ourselves with is ourselves, who we were yesterday, and who we are becoming.
"Judging yourself against others is the quickest way to drain energy and deplete yourself of joy."
So make it a rule not to compare your life to others.
If you are not happy with your current circumstance, you can look to others for inspiration or motivation, but never criticize yourself in the process.
Move your body, nourish your temple, get enough sleep, hang around with people who lift you up and be kind to yourself.
People who seem "lucky" and "have things easy", are often just more disciplined and have healthy habits.
They have daily rituals that they stick to, which often includes;
-Rising early to work on themselves
- Exercises regularly
- Eating whole, nutritious foods
- Learning and growing
There is no magic pill to get you from where you are now to where you want to be.
The first step is knowing what you want and why. The next step is believing in yourself and trusting yourself to make it happen, And the third step is loving yourself enough to continue on your journey and making your dreams a reality. From here, it is all about having great routines and habits that keep you on track.
When you make self-care a daily practise, you will start to notice positive changes happening in your life.
Just take it one day at a time and be kind to yourself along the way.
We are our own worst enemies. We call ourselves names, poke holes in our physic, tell ourselves we are unworthy, fat or ugly. Imagine saying this to our best friend! We wouldn't dare!
So WHY are we so cruel to ourselves?
We need to acknowledge that no one is perfect. We are all on this journey called life together doing the best we can.
Forgiving ourselves is a powerful exercise. What have you been holding on to?
When we allow guilt and anger to build up in our body, we create illness and disease.
Instead of letting this build up inside of us have a daily practice where you release and let go.
If you have made a mistake, remember everyone slips up from time to time, give yourself some grace and forgive yourself.
When we learn to forgive ourselves, we can also forgive others.
Remember, people are doing the best they can with their current level of awareness.
Mistakes are always an opportunity to learn and grow.
The most important relationship you have is with the person you see in the mirror every day. That's right, YOU.
Start looking at yourself in the mirror daily and really look and connect. Show yourself some kindness. Tell yourself how amazing you are, that you are enough and that you are loved.
So many people I coach can't look at themselves in the mirror with love.
They say things like "I hate what I see" (this breaks my heart every time I hear this).
How we speak to ourselves has an impact on our mental wellbeing. If you are constantly speaking negatively to yourself, what kind of message are you sending out?
That's right one of hate and negativity.
Instead of picking fault in our bodies, appearance, work and life. How about we started focusing on what we love about ourselves, what our strengths are, what we are proud of, and our achievements.
This brings us back to gratitude.
A lot of people don't like their bodies and wonder why they put on weight easily, keep getting injured or get sick.
Learn to love and honour your body. Thank it daily for giving you the gift of sight, sound, touch, taste and movement.
Thank your body for carrying you this far in life.
When we come from a place of appreciation for ourselves and our lives, we begin to attract more experiences, people and events to be grateful for.
We are all capable of greatness. Every one of us has a unique gift to bring into this world.
By beginning to show yourself some love and compassion daily, you will boost your connection to yourself and others.
From a deeper connection to self comes a new level of confidence.
This then radiates from you as you begin to honour yourself and strive to be the best you can be daily.
The biggest gift you can give yourself and others is a daily self-care practice.
If you do not love and respect yourself, why would anyone else?
We are responsible for the energy we bring into this world, so show up daily with Joy and love.
The world needs that right now.
With love and gratitude